Meera, 28, has always been a source of wisdom for her friends and family. Whether it was relationship advice, career guidance, or simply navigating life’s challenges, she was the one they could rely on. However, she never imagined that one day she’d be the one needing advice, facing a situation that completely upended her world.
She reached out, explaining her dilemma: “Hello. I never thought I’d be in a place where I felt so confused and uncertain, but here I am. Recently, I found out something about my family that’s been keeping me up at night. I need to know if I’m overreacting or if my feelings are justified.”
Meera grew up in a traditional and conservative household. Her parents raised her and her younger brother with strong values rooted in cultural expectations. As a young girl, she learned that a woman’s role was to support her family, become a devoted wife, and take care of the home. This was her reality, and she never questioned it. When she married her husband, Arjun, she naturally adopted this role. Her parents were pleased with her marriage, especially because she married someone responsible. They reassured her that she had nothing to worry about with Arjun by her side, frequently reminding her, “Arjun will take care of you now.”
Meera had always believed that any inheritance from her parents would be equally divided between her and her brother. She explained that although she and Arjun weren’t wealthy, they worked hard to maintain their household. She didn’t expect any inheritance but assumed that whatever her parents had would be fairly split between her and her brother. That assumption was shattered when she accidentally discovered their will during a visit to her parents’ house.
She hadn’t been searching for it specifically; she was looking for old documents when she came across the will. Out of curiosity, she read it, assuming it would confirm what she had always believed. However, as she read further, her heart sank.
Her parents had decided to leave everything—the family home, land, savings, and even heirlooms—to her brother. Meera wasn’t mentioned at all. Initially, she thought there had been a mistake, but as she continued reading, she saw their reasoning: her brother, being the son, would inherit everything because “he will need to support his future family.” Since Meera was married and had Arjun to support her, they felt her brother needed the inheritance more. It even stated that, as their daughter, Meera’s responsibility was now to her husband’s family.
Meera was devastated. She had always viewed her parents as loving and supportive, so seeing this decision felt like a betrayal. They hadn’t even discussed it with her. When she confronted them, they didn’t understand her reaction. Her mother explained, “But you’re married, Meera. Arjun takes care of you. Your brother needs this to start his own life when he marries. This is how things are done in our culture.” Her father added, “You should be happy for your brother; he needs this more than you.”
Now, Meera is grappling with how to respond. She feels that her value in her parents’ eyes is reduced because she’s a woman. It seems that all her years of being their supportive daughter no longer matter because she has a husband. Meera feels torn. On one hand, she wants to fight for what she believes is rightfully hers. On the other hand, she’s unsure if she should accept her parents’ decision to avoid creating a rift in the family. She’s at a crossroads, uncertain of how to move forward.
Meera, we understand how painful and unfair this situation feels. The exclusion from your parents’ inheritance based solely on your gender is deeply hurtful. Here are a few options to consider:
Open communication: Have an honest conversation with your parents. Share your feelings about the inheritance and how it’s affecting you emotionally. They might not fully grasp the depth of your pain, and this could help them understand your perspective.
Consider mediation: If a direct conversation seems too difficult, bringing in a neutral third party, like a family mediator, might facilitate a more productive discussion without causing more strain.
Focus on your independence: While the inheritance decision is significant, maintaining and building your own financial independence could give you a sense of control and empowerment.
Emphasize your contributions: Remind your parents of the role you’ve played in the family and your achievements. Sometimes, parents unintentionally overlook their daughters’ contributions, assuming they don’t need the same support.
Navigating this situation will be challenging, but understanding your worth and having open conversations may help bring some clarity to this emotionally charged issue.
