AM I WRONG FOR BEING ANGRY THAT MY 73-YEAR-OLD MOTHER STARTED DATING AGAIN INSTEAD OF FOCUSING ON OUR FAMILY?
I never thought my own mother would turn her back on us like this. Ever since my dad passed away a few years ago, I assumed she would dedicate the rest of her life to her family—to us, her children and grandchildren.
But apparently, I was wrong. Instead of being there for us like she should, she’s off playing the role of a lovestruck teenager, spending all her time and money on some guy.
She goes on dates, eats at fancy restaurants, and even plans vacations with him, while we’re left behind like we don’t matter. It’s like she’s completely forgotten where her real priorities should be.
I just don’t get it. We are her family. She already had her life with Dad—why does she think she gets to start over now?
Hello! Mom here.
Oh, sweetheart, I understand that this is hard for you. I love you and my grandchildren more than anything in the world. That will never change.
But losing your father left a hole in my life that no amount of family dinners or babysitting could fill. I spent so many years devoted to others—first to you, then to him—and when he was gone, I felt like I had nothing left for myself.
Then I met someone who makes me smile again, who reminds me that life isn’t over just because I’m older. I’m not choosing him over you—I’m just choosing to let myself be happy, too.
I will always be here when you need me, but I also deserve to live the years I have left with some joy. I hope, in time, you can understand that.
The Daughter’s Response
I read and re-read my mother’s words, my heart twisting with emotions I didn’t know how to sort through.
For so long, I had seen her as just my mom—the woman who raised me, who held our family together, who sacrificed so much for everyone else.
But in all that time, I never really thought of her as just herself.
A woman. A person. Someone with her own dreams, her own desires, and her own needs.
I had expected her to pause her life for us because that’s what she had always done. But was that really fair?
Would I expect the same of myself?
Would I want my own children to hold me back from finding happiness after heartbreak?
I sighed, setting the letter down.
Maybe I wasn’t angry at her—maybe I was just struggling to accept that things had changed. That life had moved on.
That she was moving on.
And maybe… that wasn’t such a bad thing.
I picked up my phone and typed a message.
“Mom, I’m sorry. I love you. Can we talk over dinner? I want to understand.”
Seconds later, her reply came through.
“Of course, sweetheart. I love you too.”
Maybe this was the start of something new—for both of us.